Healing Is Hard, But It Doesn’t Mean You’re Broken | Inner Work
A healing journey can be perceived as emotional healing, spiritual healing and mentally healing. No matter how you see your healing journey, you are choosing to heal the unconscious patterns that are not supporting your growth in life. The healing journey can feel extremely hard at times, but it doesn’t mean you’re broken.
As a Spiritual Mentor and Intuitive Guide I find myself on this path, pursuing my purpose of bringing more light into the world because of my own healing journey and the experiences I’ve moved through. In moments where I felt surrounded by darkness all I desired was a glimmer of light to encourage me to keep going. This is exactly how I show up for my clients and community members, being the light, inspiration, support, and guide for someone who is in the middle of the heaviness of healing.
Healing is hard, but it doesn’t mean you’re broken.
I had a friend tell me once that in her darkest moments of life she constantly thought that she was broken or there was something wrong with her. She told me that everytime she saw posts on social media or looked up spiritual information online she felt like the world was telling her to heal. In this perception her ego made her believe that she was broken and needed fixing, which created a lot more self-doubt, self-judgment and insecurities on her journey.
You are here because you’ve found yourself on this healing journey as well and you are looking for any sort of guidance and support to feel uplifted and empowered as you continue to walk this path.
In this blog I will share how my perception of healing has shifted in the before, during and after; the difference between being unconscious versus being conscious of your patterns; and why I believe healing doesn’t mean you’re broken, it actually means that you are shedding layers of a false you. The most important part of this blog is that I will share some key tips that will support you on your healing journey.
My Perception of Healing Before, During & After
Now that I have moved through 5 consecutive years of being on my spiritual healing journey I can see how my perception has shifted and evolved many times.
Whether you are new to your healing journey or not, I believe seeing someone else’s perspective can be beneficial for you to better understand your own healing.
Before I started healing…
After my mental and emotional breakdown I felt as if I was at rock bottom and so the only direction to go was up from there. At the time I began to surround myself with people who were in the spiritual conversation and I started to understand that my journey was asking me to heal.
One of the biggest reasons why I knew I needed to create healing is because I didn’t know who I was, so I needed to heal my self-perception.
The way I viewed healing then was a more glamourized picture of spirituality. I saw a spiritual awakening as manifestation, angel numbers, signs from the Universe, and uncovering your soul purpose. A very light and uplifting way of perceiving healing and what that kind of journey would look like.
During my healing…
Once I found myself deep in the journey of healing I often questioned why I had chosen this path because of how hard it had felt. There were many moments where I wondered if I could turn around and go back to before.
I started to heal because I didn’t know who I was and during the healing journey I uncovered a lot more self-judgment and insecurities that I hadn’t even realized I had been carrying.
The pain, heaviness, and emotional overwhelm of healing made some of my days extremely dark. The future was so unclear because at times I felt like I couldn’t even see past the shadows I was currently walking through.
After my healing…
I say after as if I’m finished with all the healing I will ever do in my lifetime, which I know is not true. In reality the “after” is when the light starts to become brighter and the days start to become easier.
I started to heal because I wanted my life to be filled with purpose, and a true sense of belonging. During my healing I uncovered a lot of the blocks and resistance that made me feel purposeless and like I would never belong. After my healing I finally began to feel the purpose I had always desired and it was better than I could ever have imagined.
I felt a sense of belonging not because I had found a community who had accepted me, but because I finally learned how to accept myself. My days began to carry more peace, I felt fulfilled in my work, and I learned how to hold grace for myself as I continue to heal and grow.
Now I can sit back and say I would definitely move through that path again and again and again to get to where I am. It’s not always easy here, but I feel like I have uncovered my true self and I can see that the light was always within me. My healing journey was about shedding all the layers I was carrying that was blocking my true spirit from shining through.
Healing is hard, and it’s worth it every time!
Keep reading to learn more about the difference between unconscious patterns and consciousness.
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The Difference Between Being Unconscious & Conscious to Your Patterns
Healing is the process of becoming conscious of the unconscious patterns that are exhibited in your life.
Without getting into all of the details of why we become unconscious of certain patterns or how these patterns are created, it’s the basic idea that our Ego is trying to protect us from what it believes to be unsafe.
What are unconscious patterns?
Your unconscious patterns are different thoughts, beliefs, emotional reactions, and habits or behaviours you carry that have become an innate way of living for you. Often times these unconscious patterns are actually detrimental to your evolution because they keep you stuck in a state of fear.
As an example, I carried an unconscious pattern of avoiding sharing my opinion. For a long time I said I didn’t like confrontation, not realizing this was an unconscious and unsupportive pattern that was holding me back in life.
Anytime someone shared a strong opinion that went against my values I stayed quiet and didn’t stand up for myself. I had developed people pleasing tendencies where I would do everything in my power to try and make everyone around me happy because I was terrified of confrontation.
I ended up allowing people to walk all over me and I placed my happiness on the back burner. I slowly lost myself over the years because I was so focused on how others perceived me. This was all happening without me realizing how my choices and actions were affecting me. Meaning it was all happening as unconscious patterns in my life.
What does it mean to be conscious?
You become aware of your habits, thoughts and belief systems that don’t actually support the direction you are wanting to grow in. You realize the way you’ve been living isn’t actually how you want to live.
In my example, I became aware that I was focused on everyone else’s happiness and I was limiting my own happiness. I started to see that I let my opinions and values shift and evolve because I wanted to please the people in my life. I could see that being afraid of confrontation meant that I was insecure and I didn’t feel worthy of standing up for myself.
Once I became aware of these patterns, the thoughts I had, the choices I made, and the beliefs I carried I was able to start to heal. I began to shed the layers of patterns that I had identified with for years because I could see that they were blocking me from being my full authentic self.
You’re Not Broken, You’re Shedding Layers of a False You
Healing doesn’t mean you are broken and need fixing. It means you have taken on habits, behaviours, and belief systems that were rooted in keeping you safe from the pain you experienced in the past.
As a young child I was terrified of being judged by those around me because I saw my peers being judged and how emotionally damaging it was to their self-perception. I had created behavioural patterns and belief systems unconsciously to try and protect myself from ever being judged so I wouldn’t experience that same emotional pain.
From a mindset standpoint, the fear of something is way worse than actually experiencing that thing. So when we have a fear we are willing to do everything in our power to avoid actually experiencing the thing we are afraid of.
This ends up creating layers of protection that over time we begin to identify with as our true self because we can’t remember what life was like before the emotional or physical pain. Healing is not about fixing a broken you. Healing is about shedding all the layers of the false you that were created as a protective shield. It’s not that you are no longer protected, it’s that what you once thought was meant to protect you is actually now keeping you limited from growing and evolving into a better you.
Quick Tips for Your Healing Journey
1 - Find a Support System
The darkness and heaviness of healing can feel overwhelming and draining. Walking this path on your own is what will keep you stuck in the darkness for longer than necessary. Having a support system that you feel safe in being vulnerable with is extremely important because it’s how you find your way through the darkness and move towards the light. Whether it’s a best friend, a family member, or even a mentor/healer/therapist, it’s important that you are not moving through your healing journey alone.
2 - Find Joy
Being able to bring harmony to your healing journey with pursuing joyous moments at the same time is important. Because healing can be draining, you need to have different ways to fill your cup back up with light, love and uplifting energy. The healing journey is not about only ever focusing on what needs to be healed. It’s about doing the inner work, while also creating joy and fun moments in your life.
3 - It’s Your Journey
Everyone’s journey through healing is going to be unique to the individual. You may have people trying to tell you how to do it or what to do, so remember, take what resonates and leave the rest. You don’t need to do everything the same way someone else did it. You need to find what works for you and remember this is your journey of discovering your truth.
Healing is hard, but it doesn’t mean you’re broken.
If you are looking to work with a mentor through your healing journey then I encourage you to check out my membership community to see if it resonates with you.
Until next time, sending love & light on your spiritual journey,
Sydney Smith
Spiritual Mentor
Founder of Adventuring with Poseidon Wellness
