11 Things to Look for in a Spiritual Mentor BEFORE Working with Them
Choosing a spiritual mentor to work with can be a very delicate process because it’s your life that is impacted from this decision. How do you know it’s the right spiritual mentor for you? How do you know you can trust this mentor? Why should you choose this mentor over that mentor? There are many questions you can ask yourself leading you into a spiral of over-analysis paralysis when making a decision.
I am a Spiritual Mentor and Intuitive Guide and I work specifically with emotionally exhausted empaths, drained people pleasers, and sensitive souls who want to feel connected to their true authentic self. I’m not here to convince you to work with me, you’ll know whether or not you feel connected to the work I support my clients through.
In this blog I want to share 11 things you need to look for in a spiritual mentor before you start working with them. I will try my best to clear up all your questions on how to choose a mentor that best suits your needs.
You could very easily walk away from reading the blog and decide that I am not the spiritual mentor for you, and that’s exactly what I want. I never want you to feel forced into working with me. I believe you will feel called to certain people at the right time in your life and if you do not resonate with what I share, then we are not meant to work together.
On the flip side, you will know if you feel called to my energy and you will resonate with what I share. This can be a tell tale sign that I am the spiritual mentor for you. Keep reading before you make any big decisions.
This blog is simply meant to be a resource for you on your spiritual journey in order to feel confident in your decision of working with a mentor.
Let’s jump into the 11 things I believe you need to look for in a spiritual mentor before working with them.
#1 Transparency
Can you find them online easily? Do they have a registered business? Are they willing to answer any of your questions before taking payment?
Unfortunately there are a lot of people in the world who take advantage of others and with the rise of the spiritual wellness industry more and more spams and fake accounts are becoming popular.
If you cannot find information online about the person or their business then it’s probably not the right direction for you to head in. The reason why I suggest looking for someone who has a registered business as a spiritual mentor is because I believe that creates validity in a business and what the person offers as a service. Make sure to do your research before quickly jumping in and working with a spiritual mentor.
#2 Values
Can you get a sense for their values as a spiritual mentor and person? Do their values align with your own values?
This one is really important because a spiritual mentor is meant to support and guide you on your spiritual journey. Spirituality is different from religion in the sense that it’s about gaining wisdom from your own experiences, rather than following someone else’s word. If your values don’t align with your spiritual mentors then you can easily lose yourself in their world and it could end up doing more damage than good.
Check out our values here.
#3 Personal Experiences
Does the spiritual mentor share their own personal experiences? Can you get a glimpse into who they are from their story?
I believe what makes a good spiritual mentor is a person who has learned, healed and grown through their own life experiences. Everyone’s story is different and it’s where you can see their authenticity, integrity, and the main characteristics they embody. If a spiritual mentor doesn’t share about their own journey and you can’t find a way to get to know them, then it’s time to reconsider working with them. You want to feel connected to your spiritual mentor and if you don’t know anything about them, then how can you feel connected?
As for my story, I am a recovering people pleaser and I ended up losing myself in the pursuit of taking care of everyone else. In being an empath I allowed everyone else’s emotions to trigger my own fears and insecurities. My fear of judgment pressured me into trying to make everyone else happy so I could then be happy myself. I needed to learn that I can’t control someone else’s emotions, and if I placed my happiness on someone else being happy then I was limiting my own joy. You can learn more of who I am here.
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#4 Mirrored Lives
Can you see versions or parts of your life in their stories?
When you are reading about a spiritual mentor's personal experiences, if you can see versions of your story in their life this is a good sign. Seeing yourself mirrored in their experiences shows you that they can empathize with you. You want to learn from someone who has already walked a similar path to what you are walking now.
#5 Free Content
Does the spiritual mentor offer free content so you can get a taste of how they mentor & their area of expertise?
Free content can look like absolutely anything, but the purpose of it is to give you a glimpse into the style of service a spiritual mentor provides. This can be guidebooks, meditations, videos, emails, blogs, trainings, podcasts, etc. Choosing to work with a spiritual mentor is a big decision and if you can’t see their style of mentoring or their area of expertise ahead of time, you are going into the work together blind. Get a feel for what they offer, how they mentor, and the expertise they have before making the decision to work with them.
#6 Awakening Wisdom
Does the wisdom/knowledge the spiritual mentor shares awaken something within you? Does it resonate deeply within you?
Spiritual wisdom is knowledge you carry as a spirit, however you can’t think of the knowledge at first because it’s being blocked within you by outdated conditioning and fear based thought patterns. Your spiritual journey is not only about learning new lessons, it’s about awakening the wisdom you already carry. When you listen to a spiritual mentor or read their words it’s important to recognize when a piece of information or knowledge resonates deeply in you because often it’s awakening wisdom you already carry. This is a great sign when choosing to work with a spiritual mentor because it’s telling you that their wisdom is aligned with your innate soul wisdom.
#7 Vibes
What kind of vibes/energy do you pick up from them?
When finding a spiritual mentor to work with, you want to feel good energy and a positive vibe from them. I’m not saying the person is positive, I’m saying the way you feel when you connect with their energy is a positive one. Your spirit will guide you to the right spiritual mentor to work with and if you are picking up on bad vibes, even if you can’t explain why, it’s a tell tale sign this is not the person to work with. Pay attention to the vibes or energy you pick up on from them.
#8 Change
Nothing in your life will change from working with a spiritual mentor (no matter who they are) unless you are committed to doing the work.
This is more about something to look within you before choosing to work with a spiritual mentor. A mentor cannot make you heal and grow, they can only support and guide you on your journey. If you are looking for someone who will give you the answers or make the shift happen for you, then whoever you hire will be unsuccessful. Doing the spiritual work is about doing the inner work and that requires a commitment from you.
#9 Triggering
It’s not all rainbows and butterflies when working with a spiritual mentor. It can feel triggering as you are being asked to heal through your fears, pains and insecurities.
A good spiritual mentor will hold space for you, comfort you, support you and nurture you in the process of being triggered. They won’t avoid the hard moments, they will walk with you each step of the way. This isn’t really something you can learn about a spiritual mentor before working with them, it’s something you need to know before heading into the process. Although you can always ask a spiritual mentor how they deal with being triggered on their own journey.
#10 Empowering
Does the spiritual mentors work, content and energy make you feel empowered? Does it make you feel like you can accomplish your desires?
A spiritual mentor is someone who reflects your inner light back towards you. They can often see your light, your gifts, well before you can or at least before you trust your gifts. When you connect with them do you feel empowered, capable and supported in creating the life of your dreams. As much as spiritual mentors' job is to support you in the healing work, they are also meant to uplift you and guide you through an empowering expansion on your journey.
#11 Full Body YES!
Do you feel a full body yes when you think about working with a particular spiritual mentor?
Sometimes it takes time for you to feel that gut instinct, so don’t write someone off if you don’t feel it right away. Especially if you don’t easily trust your intuition and it’s something you are wanting to strengthen. Let yourself take some time before making a decision and don’t move forward until you feel that full body yes! This is your intuition saying you are ready.
This is a list of 11 things I believe you need to look into before working with a spiritual mentor, but I would also encourage you to reflect on what you think is important in knowing before picking a spiritual mentor to work with. You have the wisdom within you and you are able to make the best decision for yourself. Start trusting your own feelings and the calling that is guiding you from within.
If you are interested in learning more about the clients I work with in my 1:1 mentoring program then check it out at the link below.
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I hope this information has helped you in your decision making process of who to work with as your spiritual mentor!
Until next time, sending love & light on your spiritual journey,
Sydney Smith
Spiritual Mentor
Founder of Adventuring with Poseidon Wellness
