A Healing Journey with Poseidon | My Earth Angel

I’ve been finding myself journaling more lately because when I allow my fingers to type away at the keyboard I begin to understand myself better. There is this creative flow that overtakes me and allows me to be witness to my own thoughts from an unbiased perspective.

In this blog I am sharing a journal entry of mine that I wrote in reflection of the 10 year anniversary of adopting my late dog, Poseidon. Honestly I was staring at a few photos I have of him on my wall, and instantly the tears flooded in and I felt all the emotions of not having him in my life for the past three and a half years. Rather than simply sit in my sadness and grief, I wanted to take a moment to honour him and all that he did for me in our 6 years together.

The space I’ve created here on my website for my blogs have always shifted and transformed based on what I’ve been moving through in life. At times I felt called to share the lessons I’d been learning, offering advice and wisdom on emotional and mental wellness, and then sharing my thoughts and perspectives on spirituality and the universe. Right now I’m in a season of creative writing through my journal entries, sharing my inner most thoughts and how I understand who I am in this world.

Maybe it’s an opportunity for you to get to know me a little better, and maybe my reflections will help you to see yourself and your life in a new way. This is my journal reflection on Poseidon, who he was to me and how we moved through life together.

Journal Entry…

I miss you.

I was 23 when I took you in. I was 29 when I lost you. I’m now 33 and I can’t believe how much life I’ve lived without you since you’ve been gone.

Our programming in life tells us to look at the milestone years and the pressures of where we should be, what we’ve should’ve achieved. By 25, 30, 40, 50, and 65. As you age you’ve been taught to look at your birthday with fear. The trouble of getting older and feeling like life is moving too fast, you haven’t achieved half of what you thought you would’ve by now, watching your younger years pass you by and feeling like you’ve missed out on something.

I’m not even 35 yet and I don’t subscribe to age and the societal milestones that I’ve been programmed to believe are important. I want to look at my life differently. I want to perceive myself through a lens of love, support, appreciation, and pride for who I’ve become, what I’ve experienced, and the path I’m moving down.

My soul-dog, Poseidon, came into my life when I was very young. I first met him when I was 22 and although he didn’t join me in my daily life until I was 23, I was able to experience life with his mom first. Athena was a sensitive spirit, with kind eyes, and a soft way of walking in this world. After Athena passed I couldn’t imagine life without a dog by my side. She opened the door for Poseidon to walk in and steal my heart forever.

KEEP READING FOR MORE OF MY REFLECTIVE JOURNAL ENTRY

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Back to the blog - A Healing Journey with Poseidon

I remember the weeks leading up to adopting him, I would visit him each day. Walking over to his spot, he would howl, jumping up and down, waiting for me to provide his daily cuddles. Our bond started strong, and never faltered till the day he died.

I was so young, discovering life, exploring around each corner, wandering wherever the path would take us. Our first trip together to the vast and far reaching lands of the Yukon was where we cemented our passion for adventure. There was no plan, only a curiosity and desire to see more that had the two of us smiling from ear to ear.

He gave me everything I never knew I needed in my 20’s. Honestly, I don’t know if I would’ve traveled by car and explored the west coast as much as I had if he hadn’t been in my life. It’s as if he gave me the confidence to go out on my own, because I was never actually alone.

At 27 a rock came crashing down on me, forever altering my life and if it wasn’t for Poseidon, I would’ve struggled through this breakdown even more than I had. I began to see Poseidon for who he really was to me, an earth angel. He saved me, he loved me when I didn’t know how to love myself, he brought me joy in my darkest moments, and he encouraged me to keep going when I didn’t feel like I could.

Adventuring with Poseidon was my healing journey. On our daily walks I reflected on my emotions, and tried to see life from a different perspective. The times we packed up the car and traveled across the country were the moments I learned to find comfort in the unknown. He told me to go to nature each and every day, to allow Mother Earth to heal me, to find stillness and be witness to magic all around us, and to breathe in the connection that effortlessly flowed between us.

Poseidon was my saviour because he was there each and every day, no matter how I felt or what I was thinking that seemed to overwhelm me. He brought me back to the moment with presence, he showed me it’s safe to feel, and he told me to find love for myself.

As his aging body began to sneak up on us, I started leaving him at home so I could continue to adventure and find joy in life. I held so much guilt in my body for saying goodbye to him, closing the door, and driving off to the mountains for a bike ride. I left him behind when he never would’ve done the same to me. But his body couldn’t keep up anymore, and I knew in my heart he was better off staying in the comforts of our home, snoozing away on his bed.

He showed me the path to joy, he reminded me what it was to live again, and he brought so much love into my life that I found healing in the darkest places. Then the dementia began to set in, as I watched his mind and his body fail him I knew he was no longer the adventure dog that he came to this world to be. The kindness I gave to him on that fateful day will never be forgotten, for it wasn’t his path to suffer and I would’ve never wanted to watch him in that state, withering away into nothing. He allowed me the space to heal so I could live, and it was my turn to offer him the grace to pass peacefully.

His job earthside was completed successfully, and now it was my turn to go on without him and show him I could do it on my own.

The milestones I experienced from 23 to 29 were with Poseidon walking beside me each step of the way. My life isn’t the culmination of my achievements, because Poseidon taught me that life is about my experiences, my curiosity leading me forwards, and the discovery of what brings me joy. He told me to walk slowly, with intention and purpose, as I continue to witness the magic of the world around me.

Instead of focusing on who I will be and where I will be at 35, 45, 55 and so on, I’m choosing to live a life that feels good to me, placing one foot in front of the other courageously, while knowing Poseidon is in my heart as my greatest teacher.

I am still young and yet I feel as if I have the wisdom of a 90 year old within me. The things Poseidon and I experienced together changed me forever, and the healing he guided me through has allowed me to see life with an open mind and an expansive heart.

Our teachers and guides can come to us in many different forms, and their purpose is to bring us back home to ourselves, our spirits. This is what Poseidon did for me. He led the way at first, then walked beside me once I began to see the light, and now he follows behind as an angel ready to catch me when I fall.